What To Do If Your Girlfriend Is Lazy And Unmotivated

If your girlfriend is lazy and unmotivated then this can be so frustrating. This is what to do about it.


You have to do something about it because this character of hers can end up messing with your relationship.


As a man, if your girlfriend is in such a state you have to do something about it.


You can’t just ignore it and say that she isn’t your wife so you can teach her or ask her to change her behaviour.


Asking her to change her character trait that has a negative influence on your relationship isn’t controlling.


You have to be responsible for your girlfriend and help her change from the person she was to someone more incredible.


Couples should always support and build each other. So, make a point of changing your girlfriend to the better version of herself.


A person can change in a relationship all you need is an effort to make that change. I can’t tell you that it will be easy or that the change will happen overnight.


Here is an article that I wrote about changing a person in a relationship. Don’t forget to read this if you are planning to influence a positive change in her.


You might like this: Can a person change in a relationship?


So, before I share with you what to do about this character trait let me outline for you the disadvantages of laziness in your relationship at large.


You have to understand that if she is lazy on doing some of the other tasks like washing dishes, doing laundry and cooking don’t think that this will only remain on these chores.


This will later extend to your relationship and it will affect it so badly.


These are the disadvantages of having a lazy and unmotivated girlfriend;

  • She will not make an effort of changing the routines of the relationship and thus your relationship will become boring and dormant.
  • You will be forced to do most of the planning for your relationship this will end up exhausting you and you will give up on them thus crashing your relationship.
  • The goals in your relationship will not be achieved if your partner keeps dragging you behind.
  • She will even fail to make an effort of pleasing you; this will eventually make her messy.
  • She will not help you to make the most important decisions in your relationship; you will be left to make all decisions on your own.
  • She will eventually stop being committed to that relationship because commitment will never work out for a lazy person and an unmotivated one.
  • She might end up kicking you away and ignoring you completely because she will rarely make an effort to come on the dates that you plan. She will cancel the dates.
  • You will hardly accomplish anything important in your life with her because she will not be motivating you to do anything important for the better of your future.


If you truly love her then make a point of changing her, because without doing that you might end up ruining your relationship.


This is what to do if your girlfriend is lazy and unmotivated;


1. Take your time and observe her and find out why she is that way.

There is always a reason behind everything that a person might end up doing. So, the first step you should do is this.


Don’t go to her with all force and ask her to change yet you have no idea of why she is acting that way.


Take your time and observe her. Find the reasons why she is behaving in such away.


You never know she is acting that way because she has so many issues from her family that is stressing her. Not every smile you might end up seeing on someone means that he or she is happy and everything in his or her life is cool.


So, try to find out why she is lazy and unmotivated by starting to ask her questions. Ask her questions that will make her open up easily without knowing that you are condemning her for her character trait.


Don’t show her that you are mainly concerned about knowing why she is lazy and unmotivated. You can by asking her a question like, “Which kind of life would you like to have?”


This kind of question can expand and you will eventually end up finding why she behaves the way she does.



2. Involve her in the activities that you do and teach her something new.

If she is lazy and she spends all day in bed doing nothing, then use this approach. Ask her to help you with some of the things that you do.


For instance, if you are having a grocery let her help you to arrange vegetables and fruits in the fridge, let her help you to do some calculations on the amount of cash you have earned in a day.


Involving her in the things you do, doesn’t mean that you will make her active in one day. The good thing about doing with her the things you do will make her see how hardworking you are.


She will be observing all the effort you put into your work. If she is someone who understands then she will also find something productive to do. She can even go to an extent of asking to work together with you.


This might end up changing her and become an active and motivated person. She will always be ready to use her time on doing something productive and let go of her lazy character.


3. Ask her to go out with you on a double date.

I know you may be wondering how a double date with your friends will make her active and motivated.


This can change her in a very positive way. It depends on how you will handle this date.


Let her see how other couples handle each other, let her see how the other girls behave before their boyfriends.


She will see the effort that these other girls are making for their relationships. This will eventually motivate her to start putting effort into her relationship.


Sometimes if you lack motivation just observe how your friends are handling their issues you will get motivated also.


After this double date, she will start to put the effort into the relationship and things that matter to her.


4. Motivate her and encourage her to find new things to give a try.

You will also have to motivate her and encourage her. Compliment her on any small tasks that she does.


It doesn’t matter how tiny the task might be, compliment her and tell her how happy you are seeing her doing something productive.


This will make her happy. She will ask herself, “if a small task has made him that happy about me, what about a big task?”


This will eventually encourage her to start doing more tasks and put an effort into your relationship.


If she has nothing to do encourage her to find anything productive to do. You can even tell her to go and volunteer in any company that she finds cool.


The moment she starts to keep herself committed then she will start to be a busy person and she will be motivated even to find more things to do.


5. Let her know that you are not happy seeing her behaving the way she does.

You never know maybe she has no idea if you aren’t happy about it. So, make a point of having a conversation with her.


Let her know that you aren’t happy seeing her behave the way she does. Don’t forget to mention to her the dangers of being lazy in a relationship.


Don’t talk to her in a way that will make her feel bad about herself. Choose your words wisely. Speak in a way that she will see you as a person who is concerned but not a boyfriend who is blaming her for how she is.


Make her understand if she keeps behaving the way she does then you will not make any significant step in your relationship. On top of this remind her of the goals that you all need to achieve in your relationship.


If she is a person who is smart and understanding then she will listen to you carefully and ask you what to do about her situation.


6. Take it easy on her and give her time to adjust.


You have to understand that people are different. We have people who are always ready for a change while others take a while before they adjust to the changes.


Don’t force her to be active suddenly. Take it easy on her. Be patient with her she will eventually be the kind of person you want her to be.


You should also, stop comparing her with other people. If somebody’s girlfriend is smart, active and super hard working don’t try to measure your girlfriend using them.


Everyone has a different potential. You never know that there are things that your girlfriend can do while the other girls can’t do.


So, everyone has his or her own power.


If your relationship is new and according to what you hear from her is that she hasn’t have been in many relationships then this is probably that she isn’t experienced.


She might even have no idea of what she wants in that relationship. So, give her time she figures things out.


You might like this: If you don’t know what you want in your relationship (Do this)




If your girlfriend does nothing the whole day other than sleep. Then make a point of spending most of the time with her. Take her outdoors and do something productive with her. But if she does that and you go and join her then she will never change.


Make an effort to mould her into the woman you want her to be. If you will fail to do that then you might end up getting bored with her and you will eventually lose interest in her. When that happens you will finally be fining yourself cheating on her.


This will wreck your relationship and you won’t have any ability to save it. So, do what is right if you really love her. If you ignore it now, you might later regret it when eventually you get to marry her and you never thought of changing her.


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